I have been reading a lot of articles lately stating that women should not be held accountable for making their husbands/boyfriends better people. Some of these articles state that women have enough to do – raise children into awesome human beings, run a clean house, look physically fit and stylish, have a high level education, crush it in their career field, and be a mentally balanced person – they also do not need the pressure of inspiring men to be better people. There are many roles to fill and we all want to be good in whatever those roles are – Teacher, Coach, Mom, Wife, Sister, Business Owner, Chef, Accountant, etc.
So, if my husband said “You make me want to be a better man”, am I supposed to say or feel that I don’t need this additional pressure and he should already want to be a good man or at least strive to be a better person? Don’t most people try to better themselves in some way?
I can understand that being a woman in the world today is a difficult and demanding thing. There are multiple roles to play and stereotypes to break. But men have demanding roles to fill as well – be the high salary earner in the house, spend a lot of time at work and a lot of time at home, be athletic and tough but also sensitive, raise well-rounded and hardworking kids, know how to help out around the house without offending the wife, be smart and clever but not offensive or condescending.
I think that if someone says “you make me want to be a better person”, then take it as a compliment. Try not to take it on as more pressure or as just another person to please. Take it instead as a compliment – you are such an amazing person and that someone looks up to you. Role models and genuine compliments are hard to come by and it’s an honor to be someone’s role model, no matter in what way. Instead of putting more weight on your shoulders, take it as your hard work and good work ethic are noticed and idolized. You may actually be shaping a person into a person of many roles, just like you. Is that such a bad thing?